Plus, raising Miguel while working full-time must have been difficult. “Your Miguel is a pretty great kid,” Murphy tells her, and she’s moved by the sacrifices his parents have made for him living half your life undocumented sounds awful. “Why can’t I admit that there are some things in life I’m just not good at?” Oh, honey, let’s make the stuffing. The scene in the kitchen is so grim that Maria suggests that she just sell the house. “The storm will never end, there will be no food, and they’ll find our remains here in the spring.” Pat Patel takes an ostentatious bite of his soyquito: “How sad for you.” Phyllis says “restaurant people” should sit down on Thanksgiving, but Maria bravely volunteers to help. It reminds Frank and Miles of “stinkin’ Nazis.” Reports from the kitchen suggest that things are not going well. Corky switches from football to the Thanksgiving Day parade, which reminds Phyllis of the good old days in NYPD Parking Enforcement. If you ask Frank, it’s Avery’s fault, “because she loves you and wants you to be happy and we have to pay for it.”Ĭut to … well, we’re still the living room, but time has passed and Miguel and his lovely parents have joined us. “This is not good, who let this happen?” he asks. Avery’s hoping that the taco truck portends turkey enchiladas or something, but then he finds out that Murphy’s cooking. Won’t they stay? They will, which is good, because you know and I know how these things work and we can stop worrying about whether Thanksgiving dinner will be saved. The taco truck is idling outside.īut there’s a snowstorm coming, Murphy says. Every Thanksgiving, they park in front of “one of those ‘recently divorced dads’ apartment buildings” and make a bundle. Murphy realizes she’s forgotten to invite Miguel to dinner, but would he like to join them? No, he’s working with his parents tonight. Phyllis and Miguel arrive, bearing banana schnapps and all of the other alcohol she’s had trouble moving. (I’m summarizing.) Murphy objects: “That did not happen to my turkey.” It grew up in Vermont and had its own room and free cable “and then … one bad day.” Anyway, Pat’s brought his own food: a soyball sub, soystrami, and soysage. “Soooo,” Pat asks him, “are you excited to feast on a tortured creature who spent a short miserable life trapped in a cage with thousands of other turkeys,” grain, blood, etc. “I don’t smell any turkey roasting,” Frank says, as everyone settles in. How long will this take, Ken? Five and a half hours? Great, there’s the doorbell! “Uh-oh,” Ken says. She opens the oven door to find the instruction booklet still wrapped in pristine plastic. Everyone thinks she can’t cook, but she’s sure going to show them! She puts in a call to the Turkey Hotline (via landline speakerphone, I’m charmed) and has an informative but bruising conversation with “Ken.” (It’s not his real name.) She’s pretty wound up about getting this right, but Ken puts her in her place: “It’s the turkey hotline, not the suicide hotline.” Has she preheated the oven? No. (Julius!!!) “It’s just that there are lovely ones online for free,” she says, in the voice someone uses when they know that it’s tacky to order hot water at restaurants and bring their own tea bag but does it anyway.Ĭut to Murph in the kitchen, standing before the $350 turkey and wearing the ludicrous turkey apron that came with it. Pat Patel, who’s vegan, asks why she’ll spend $350 on a turkey but she wouldn’t chip in for a birthday card for Julius. Come on, Murphy entreats she’s bought a $350 turkey. “Shouldn’t you be starting to lose your memory by now?” Miles asks. Alas, Murphy has a long memory: Aunt Cheryl died two years ago. Miles jabs the elevator button with increasing desperation as he tells Murphy that he’s already spending the holiday with his Aunt Cheryl. Obviously the possibility of a meal cooked by Murphy Brown is alarming, so Miles and Frank both hope to sneak off of the set before she can bully them into it. And you know what? This episode came out a lot better than the $350 turkey Murphy bought for the holiday! (The failure to produce an edible turkey was, like the coming of the Very Special Episode About Immigration, foreordained.)Īvery Brown will be home for Thanksgiving for the first time in many years, and Murphy is celebrating by forcing everyone to come join them for a home-cooked meal. Like the casting call must have been “Male, 18-25, Latino, to play Undocumented Young Adult in Donald Trump’s America.” So when Murphy invites Miguel and his parents to her Thanksgiving dinner, well, I tried to reserve judgment. We’ve known that Murphy Brown’s Very Special Episode About Immigration was coming since the moment Phyllis hired Miguel, a college dude whose DACA status has come up in all but one of his scenes this season. Hello, turkeys! I hope you’re enjoying eating leftovers straight out of the refrigerator.
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